Everyday Life, Parenting

Happier In Winter Project

Hello, fellow winter haters. What, you don’t hate winter? I wish I were more like you! I’m getting a tiny bit better at seeing the beauty in it. The stark lines of tall trees against a pale blue sky, the dramatic sunsets, the frosty white grass…I’m not immune to these gifts of the season. But I still could do without winter for many, many years.

Three years ago, my winter hatred was running at an all time high. We had just downsized into our current house, I had a baby and a two-year-old, and I felt like I just couldn’t handle the cold weather season. For better or worse, the weather always affects my outlook on life. At the time, the book on my nightstand was Happier at Home by Gretchen Rubin. Inspired by her attitude and her title, I invented a Happier in Winter Project. I wrote out a list of things I could do to make winter bearable, and maybe, maybe even enjoyable, and I pinned it to my wall calendar in the kitchen. That winter of 2012-2013 turned out to be blessedly mild, but this winter doesn’t seem to be following suit. So I’m pulling out my Happier in Winter list and sharing it today. Add your ideas and help us all endure!

~Happier in Winter ~

  1. Plant lots of pansies, or indoor houseplants.  I always, always kill houseplants. But pansies are pretty hardy outdoor flowers where I live.
  2. Remember: exercise is the best way to stay warm. And exercise always comes with nice perks, like a little less winter weight gain. One can dream, right?
  3. Hold lots of household dance parties. Also counts for #2.
  4. Take your vitamins! 
  5. Play some instruments . I will hand out the recorder and harmonica and have a marching band around the house with the kids, or have them play their instruments while I play the piano. I’m not going to lie–I don’t do this often. There’s a good chance the “fun” ends in a headache for mom. =)
  6. Make paper snowflakes. Two years ago we glued them on one of our windows. Looking back, it was like we warded off snow with them. Not a flake fell on our house that season! I’m planning on making these with Ella soon.
  7. Pick a room to paint a nice, light color. This year, I’ll probably do our bathroom. It’s currently a garish yellow, and it’s the last room that needs painting in the house.
  8. If you’re a parent with small children, designate a child-free time to make busy bags for your children. 
  9. Graham crackers and frosting
    Photo: mommytools.blogspot.com

    Have indoor picnics and tea parties. Get out some cheerful dishes and turn graham crackers into fine, teatime delicacies with some leftover frosting or cinnamon and sugar.

  10. Plan library days and museum days.
  11. Pin a whole bunch of soup recipes and then actually make one or two of them.
  12. Rearrange a room. Sometimes a different perspective is all it takes to lift a mood.
  13. Drink more smoothies.
  14. Drink more water. 
  15. Drink more wine. Just kidding. 
  16. Bake some healthy (and not so healthy) snacks and don’t worry about the mess.
  17. Splurge on a lunchtime restaurant with an indoor playground once in a while.
  18. Load shelves and e-readers with cheerful books. The definition of “cheerful” books varies from reader to reader. Winter is the best time for whatever type of book you consider a comfort read for you.
  19. My jolly winter guy (2012)

    Put hats, scarves, and gloves in an easily accessible place so it’s easy to bundle up and enjoy what sunshine there is.

  20. Read wintry poetry and find some favorite winter quotes. Here’s one that puts things into perspective for me: “The wind was blowing, but not too hard, and everyone was so happy and gay for it was only twenty degrees below zero and the sun shone.” -Laura Ingalls Wilder. Only!?! Robert Frost is also a good winter poet (for real, no pun on the name intended).
  21. Be crafty. Sew something, paint something, knit something…whatever kind of creativity floats your boat.
  22. And finally….sometimes you just have to make it a movie day. 

We’re looking at a cold week here in the southeast, so I’ll be hitting the “Happier in Winter” list pretty heavily in the next few days. Share your ideas to help us all out!

Parenting, Reviews

For The Children’s Sake

I saw For The Children’s Sake often around my house as I grew up. I remember it clearly Cover art (Penguin Classics Edition/1989; The Illustrated Children's Library Edition/2002): <i>Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy</i> by Jessie Willcox Smith.because the cover illustration is by Jessie Wilcox Smith, who has been my favorite illustrator since I read her version of Little Women. The cover was the only part of the book that interested me until just a couple of months ago, when my mom held it up and asked, “Do you want this book?”

“Is it good?” I asked.

“I think so.”

“Okay, I’ll take it.”

Well. To say that “it is good” is an egregious understatement. It is very good. In fact, it is the best book I’ve read on educating children so far. It has already become instrumental in forming my home educating philosophy. And it’s really not only for parents who solely homeschool, but for anyone who has children or works with children.

For the Children's SakeIn For The Children’s Sake, Susan Schaeffer Maculay (daughter of Francis and Edith Schaeffer) gives a basic of overview of Charlotte Mason’s thinking on what children need. She has ideas that go far beyond the three R’s. Here’s my favorite: Children are actually little people.

Some of you are going, “…and?” Yes, this seems like it should be very obvious, but it seems like children are so often treated like their intellectual skills are nonexistent.  I recently had a conversation with a someone whose granddaughter’s teacher told her that her granddaughter is so smart. She told this grandmother, “I couldn’t believe I was actually having a conversation with a six-year-old!” I’m sure most of you already are well aware of how conversational six-year-olds are.

Another one of my favorite Charlotte Mason points is that children do not desire or need “twaddle.” What is “twaddle?” You know those books that say things like, “I see Spot. Spot is brown. Spot has a tail”…those books? Well, those may serve some purposes, but mostly they are twaddle. Maculay points out that Mason is right when she says children need “living books,” books that will capture their imaginations and live on in their minds after the story is over. These are the kinds of books that will instill a love of learning and literature in children.

Another highlight of the book is the importance of reaching out to the heart and soul of a child. Education is not about just feeding children’s brains knowledge. They need to play. They need to be surrounded by nature as often as possible. And above all, they need to know love and a sense of being well cared for. This isn’t an environment that can only be found in homeschooling environments, but it is a far cry from most public schools. Because the majority of our nation’s children are in public school, it becomes even more important for parents to take their role in their children’s fully rounded education very seriously. I currently have my children at home with me, but I can see how important it may someday be for me to guard their time at home from educational TV, computer games, and whatever else may seem good but cannot replace the real-ness of experiencing the world around them. I also need to be more proactive, even now when my kids are always at home, about looking into their faces and truly listening to their thoughts. We can all get so preoccupied with our own activities. Mason believed children need to know that their value is inherent because they are “fearfully and wonderfully made” and are “image bearers,” in body, mind, and soul.

There’s a lot more to this book, but those are the highlights for me on this read-through. It will be a book I’ll return to as my children grow. Charlotte Mason is a pretty popular person these days in home education circles. Maculay published this book about her ideas before Mason came back into vogue. There is a ton of resources for people who want to delve deeper into the Charlotte Mason method (which I’m not entirely sure Charlotte Mason actually invented…it’s more based on her ideas, if I’m not mistaken). Whatever you and your children do in the education realm, the questions Maculay raises and the ideas she presents in For The Children’s Sake are well worth considering.

If you’ve read it, post a comment! I’d love to know what you think. 

Reading, Reviews

Lila by Marilynne Robinson

I recently picked up Gilead by Marilynne Robinson and was stunned by the artistry of it. Robinson can weave together a tale and truth, grace and reality, love and hardship so well! I force myself to read her work slowly, to take in each word and try to truly Lila (Gilead, #3)realize what she means. She is that kind of writer. This year she released a new book, Lila. It is a different perspective of the marriage detailed in Gilead. Lila is the wife of John Ames, the main character of Gilead, and this book named for her is about her back story and how she came to the town of Gilead and proposed to the elderly pastor. Lila faces lots of hardships before coming to Gilead, none told in too much detail but the full weight of them is there between the lines. The theme of homelessness returns in this book, which seems to be a topic that’s on Robinson’s mind a lot. Lila starts reading a Bible when she comes to Gilead. She grapples with the fact of what happens on earth coexisting with the truths about a good and just God. I wouldn’t say she draws very clear conclusions, but she makes progress as the book goes along. The story line is amazing, and the way it weaves perfectly with Gilead is mind blowing, kind of like the 2nd and 3rd Bourne Trilogy movies, when you realize it’s all happening at the same time.

Beyond the plot and all its nuances and important themes, there are passages that stay with me for their beauty. Maybe it’s because I’m a sleep deprived mom of three children age 5 and under, but this one was my favorite:

That sound of settling into the sheets and the covers has to be one of the best things in the world. Sleep is a mercy. You can feel it coming on, like being swept up in something…You had to trust sleep when it came or it would just leave you there, waiting.

Well, isn’t that the truth.

If you haven’t read Robinson before, start with Gilead.  I haven’t read Home, but I plan to very soon!

Everyday Life

A Piece of White Paper

It seems like there has been an out and out frenzy in the blogging world for months. All the writers feel the need to post something profound about the same topics: first Thanksgiving, then Christmas, and now New Year’s. Don’t get me wrong! There have been some awesome posts that I have really benefited from. But I’m starting to feel like there is a thought overload in my life. My brain needs some calm, still space, completely empty of other people’s thoughts. How about yours? I love resolutions (LOOOOVE). Thinking and planning to live intentionally is one of my favorite things in the world. But if I could give you one thing on this New Year’s Day, it would be a blank piece of white paper.

Here it is:

paper

You can just stare at it if you want, and soak in the emptiness of it. I imagine this is the kind of cathartic gazing a person could do who lives in a snowy climate. All that white, clean landscape surrounding you…ahhh. But the rest of us have to resort to a piece of white paper.

The best thing about this piece of paper is you can do whatever you want with it. Listmakers can get out a pen and write a list. Resolution makers can make some resolutions. Ranters can write out how badly 2014 went and just get it out of their systems. Artsy folks can make a snowflake to remind them of the beauty of white space, and then paint the snowflake black and frame it on white lace and enjoy the funky simplicity of all their handmade decor (I’m jealous of you, if you can’t tell). Painters can paint on it, sketchers can sketch on it, sports junkies can make a paper football…the possibilities are endless.

Or you can just throw it away. More power to you.

If you really, really must know, my New Year’s resolution this year is just that: white space. I want more emptiness on my calendar, in my home, on my counter tops, on my to-do lists. I want more empty white journal pages staring at me in the morning and I want time to fill them. I want to spend less time reading other people’s blogs (though they are really wonderful!) and more time writing on my own. I hope I don’t hurt anyone’s feelings when I say ‘no’ to some things so I can say ‘yes’ to other things that are less obvious to the world but just as important. I am desperate for calm places in my life, and space for the true fullness of love and friendship to overflow into.

Hey, is it okay if I just frame a white piece of paper? It would be super symbolic! Okay, yes, that’s dumb. I’m hopeless when it comes to textural art. But there it is, your white piece of paper from me. Do what you will with it. Either way, I can’t thank you enough for reading my blog in 2014 and I am honored that you choose to read my words in this world of so many thoughts competing for the space in your life. I wish you a joyful 2015 and I hope you will be able to claim some white space of your very own to enjoy the blessings that the year will bring.

“For from His fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.” John 1:16

Everyday Life

Give Freedom and Get A Merry Christmas For All

I had some high hopes for the Christmas season this year. We were going to do crafts. We were going to make our own bows to decorate the garland on the front porch. I was going to make a burlap banner that said something joyous like “Joy.” Profound.

Oh, and I was going to make my own candles. Ha! Knee slapper.

Every year I make all these plans that seldom ever happen. The only difference from this year and the other years when my over zealous plans have failed is that I am okay. Really! I’m okay that we only baked one thing (yesterday), that we still don’t have bows on our garland, that there is no burlap banner gracing our mantle (burlap is cool, but why? Something to ponder).

I’m okay because I’m embracing the word “Freedom” this Christmas. In fact, it’s turning out to be the best gift I could have given to my family. This is especially true for my daughter. Creative license is like a love language for five-year-old Ella. She unfurls like a Christmas rose when I let her do her own things. Our house really doesn’t have a finished feel at all this year. It looks like this:

IMG_2934

And this:

IMG_2935

 

And this:

IMG_2937

Err…that may be a little too much creative license taken by the 3-year-old boy in our house.

I wouldn’t say our Christmas season has been “magical” because let’s be real, we still deal with sleepless nights, bad attitudes, hectic work schedules for Daddy, and plain ol’  real life in the midst of the holiday season. But giving this gift called Freedom has changed the overall feel of our Christmastime celebrations. I made this decision that we weren’t going to stress the small stuff early on in November, but I didn’t expect that it would make our whole Christmas feel like something closer to light and cheery instead of stressful and performance driven. And now I’m realizing, isn’t Freedom what Christmas is all about?

“It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.” (Galations 5:1)

Yes. Freedom is not just for the Fourth of July. Freedom is for every day, and especially Christmas Day. It’s the best gift humanity has ever been given! Freedom from the law, freedom from fear, from death, from striving to be perfect, and freedom to love and be loved. I struggle to put “give more love” into practice, but now I’m thinking it involves giving freedom to those we love.

I highly recommend including some freedom in your gift giving this year. It’s not too late. Let the children make a mess in the kitchen. Let your husband wear that ugly sweater/sweatshirt/fishing shirt without comment. Let your family members be sad if they feel sad, even on Christmas. Don’t sweat it if the bread doesn’t rise for Christmas dinner. It may not be the easiest gift you’ve given, but giving freedom gets easier and more joyful as you go along.

I hope you have a very, very merry Christmas!

With love,

Mia

Like this? Read What Christmas Looks Like Sometimes