Tag: homeschooling with littles

Everyday Life, Parenting, Quick Lit, Reading, Reviews

Thirty Minute Days and Bookends and Books

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Hey friends! What have you been reading lately? I have to admit, my reading life has been quiet lately. I do have a few good book recs for you below, but only a few right now. I was talking to a friend in a similar stage of life -parenting and homeschooling big kids, while also parenting babies and preschoolers, taking our big kids to various sports, attempting to maintain healthy relationships – and we agreed, we have a grand total of about thirty minutes of “free time” a day. That’s all the time there is right now that doesn’t involve a home task like folding laundry or a parenting moment like reading to children.

Thirty whole minutes.

Thirty minutes to exercise, reply to texts and emails, shop for anything we need online, take a shower, work on a project, or do any other thing that doesn’t involve the care and keeping of home and family. Thirty minutes to do all that is required to be the healthy, put-together, accomplished modern women we’re supposed to be. Thirty minutes to decide what’s worthwhile.

“Yep, thirty minutes,” we nodded and ruefully smiled in solidarity.

Naming that to a friend and stating it here now is simply sharing this piece of my life. It’s not to complain or to say, “someone, tell me how to squeeze out of my life more usable time for my own pursuits!” The reality is simple: that thirty minutes of free time is all I expect in a typical day. I’m learning to sit more comfortably with that reality. When I take on a project, be it writing or home improvement or anything, I know that thirty minute time slot per day is all that project is going to get in this season.

I keep on using the phrase “in this season” because I am aware that it won’t always be like this. Someday my small children won’t require my full attention in their every waking moment (side note: my 12-month-old is my biggest handful yet, y’all), because they won’t be small, and that fact catches at my heart and compels me to cherish the season for what it is. Rest assured, that’s what I’m doing. But it’s impossible to ignore this: right alongside being happily present in the glorious life season I’m in is learning to be okay in the Thirty Minute Days reality.

So for now, I do a lot of things less than I used to. Yes, I even read less than I used to. But I still read. I still breathe. The two go hand-in-hand in a way I can’t explain. Some of you know what I mean. I read a nonfiction book for a few minutes every morning before the kids get up. I read a fiction book every night before I fall asleep. I literally bookend my days. And I stay sane. Another hand-in-hand fact that I can’t explain but that is absolutely true. Bookending my days with actual books keeps me a feeling like an actual person. Sure, I wish I had more time and mental space for writing my own stuff. Someday I’ll even watch a TV series or something outside of my current norm, but for now, book ending my days and living with the fact that between those bookends, I will only have thirty minutes to pursue all the other things is alright. My prayers in these Thirty Minute Days often are only an incoherent “oh, help.” But what I’m really saying is “Please. Help me seek and share delight and love in this day without wishing anything away, help me to be wise in all these minutes, help me to live the life You called me to live with joy.”

The Books I’ve Read in October/November

The Thursday Murder Club – This is one of those books whose characters you instantly fall in love with and whose pages you can’t turn fast enough. The pace of the plot was perfect, the setting so real, and the writing both humorous and thoughtful. I wouldn’t call myself a big mystery lover, but if I am going to like a mystery, it’s gotta’ have a lot of good literary elements around it. Five stars. (Just got the sequel on my Kindle from the library — squee!)

The Last Chance Library – A novel that’s an ode to local libraries and the people who love them, as well as a delayed coming of age narrative that’s becoming more common in modern storytelling. I liked the setting, the writing style, and most of the characters (the main character was a bit exasperating, but that’s part of the plot). I sure did want to go to my local library simply to be there every time I picked up this book! Four stars.

The Pearl Thief – I have waited far too long to pick up this prequel to Code Name Verity and I hereby swear to read everything by Elizabeth Wien as quickly as possible. Her two books I’ve read so far are a unique combination of quality characters navigating the new postmodern world after WWI and into WWII with fabulous settings and plenty of action to keep readers absolutely enthralled.

Gentle and Lowly – I started this in September on the recommendation (and as a gift from) my parents and have since realized lots and lots of people are reading this book right now and that is a very good thing. It’s full of the kind of truths churched people need to hear as much as unchurched people about who God is and how God really loves us all. I have to admit, I don’t always love the writing style – when you read as many Puritan writers as Dane Ortlund, that probably tends to affect your own writing a bit – but the content is profound. Simple, but profound, and profoundly lost in my own reading of the Bible often. I always take my time with nonfiction (I mean, I give it about ten minutes a day so yeah, that’s going to take a while), but this is a book I’m going through even more slowly than my usual pace, taking it in each short chapter in a morning and thinking it over for a few days between. I’ve got two more chapters to go. Five stars.

Wonderland – Not my favorite middle grade novel I’ve read lately. Too rushed, too heavy, too many characters left undeveloped. 2 stars.

Honey – A short and light story by the author of Pie, my favorite middle grade novel I read this year. I’m thinking of reading it aloud to my kids in the next few weeks. Honey doesn’t have as compelling a mystery or fully developed characters as Pie, but it’s a solid book just the same. 3.5 Stars.

A Place to Hang the Moon – I already read this beautiful, moving book by myself earlier this year. Now, one of my children is studying this time period in school, so it didn’t bother me at all to read this one again, this time aloud to my kids. They are enjoying it and asking lots of good questions about the historical time period (they’re ages 12, 10, 7, and 4). I don’t know that I would pick it to read aloud to just my 7-year-old or 4-year-old, it’s really more geared towards the 8 and above group, but it’s the kind of quality literature that everyone can get something out of. (Psst – I did skip parts of the “rat catching” chapter since I knew that one is kind of graphic for the little ones and largely unnecessary for the plot).

I’ve also got a lot of books piling up on my To-Be-Read shelf (aka my nightstand) but as you can imagine, lines from the song “Let It Be” play in my mind pretty constantly in these days. You know, in these Thirty Minute Days I keep going on about…they go by in about thirty minutes, too, it seems, so the name has double meaning! But the books will still be there when I get to them, won’t they?

Until then, happy reading and here’s to living joyfully in whatever season you find yourself in today.

Much love to you,

Mia/Alana

Everyday Life, Parenting

My One Answer for How to Homeschool with Littles

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Taking a break from writing about books and book culture in our homes to answer this frequently asked question:

How do you homeschool with little ones always around?

Wait, I should be the one asking this question, right? I’m the new homeschool mom with little kids!  This is our 5th year homeschooling and my brain is finally catching on: “Ohhh. I should know this now…” Up until this point, my answer has been so unhelpful. A shrug and a “some days are better than others!” is all I’ve mustered because (1) I hate to sound like I’ve got it all figured out and (2) I don’t have it all figured out! But I do know this: We want to instill in our children a love of learning, the ability to learn for themselves, and the strength of character that comes through hard work and good relationships. Our ideal for our homeschooling days may be full of warmth and beauty, but the chaos that comes with babies, toddlers, and/or preschoolers wages war on our ideal. How can this ever work?

This is about what our homeschool life looks like every day. There are crumbs on the floor, a babbling baby at the table, and a conglomeration of papers, pencils, and crayons scattered everywhere. We are all together the whole time, from youngest to oldest, either at the kitchen table or at desks in our schoolroom, like a crazy one-room schoolhouse in 1858. How in this madness do we (a) learn together and (b) still like each other?? How do you homeschool with littles in the mix? I’ve thought and thought about how to answer this question, and I keep coming back to one over-arching practice in our family. I wish it were a quick fix, a busy bag solution or a magic scheduling technique, but it’s nothing very pinnable like that. It’s totally uncool because the word “longsuffering” comes to mind. But let’s leave out “longsuffering” and use the word commitment.” My one answer to homeschooling with Littles is an everyday commitment to practicing togetherness.

So fun and snappy, I know. And what does it even mean? Well, after Day One of my homeschooling career, I realized my ideal of one child doing schoolwork with me while one child played quietly with toys and another napped was never going to happen. That just doesn’t fly in the world of kids under age 5 who have to be touching me/each other all day every day or spontaneously combust. Right away, I could see there would be no separating small children from our schooling. But if these tiny people expected to be included in the homeschooling fun (and they did), they would have to also expect to BEHAVE. No interrupting, no whining, no singing songs that sound strangely similar to Benny and the Jets out of tune incessantly under their breath. I guess the idea became if they wanted to be treated like students, they would have to behave like students. It’s crazy to expect this from a two or three-year-old, right? Maybe, but after weeks of consistent (and sometimes frustrated) training, an amazing thing happened – they behaved. They could sit and listen to our read aloud, they could color and be quiet during history, and a lot of times they could even answer many of the same questions about the lesson that their older sibling(s) could. I was floored.

I’m not really sure in those early days if I had an epiphany about setting schooltime behavior standards or if it just sort of happened out of necessity, but I can’t recommend it highly enough. If you’re plunging into homeschooling with little ones in your home, or you’re already wading through it, maybe practicing togetherness—welcoming the younger children into the experience along with setting standards of behavior—could change your days as much as it changed mine. Separating them from our homeschool life certainly didn’t work for me! To make our home the peaceful and loving place I envision it to, I have to keep practicing this togetherness of welcoming the small ones into our school environment.

Crazily enough, now I wouldn’t have it any other way. I think having someone like my four-year-old involved actually enriches the experience. For one thing, she is hilarious, and laughing is good for our souls. But more importantly, our family culture being built on shared narratives and histories gives us a lot to talk about and imagine further as we learn it all together. But that never would have happened if we hadn’t set some expectations at the beginning!

So that’s my answer, my one big homeschooling with Littles discovery – if you expect great behavior from them and teach them how to do that…well, some day, it might just happen. =) I realize so much of it has to do with what personalities I’m dealing with and my own upbringing (I was the oldest in a homeschool family). But because it’s worked so great for me, I figured I would give sharing it a shot, and finally give a straight answer to that frequently asked question!

And now for some more fun and snappy side notes I’ve learned to stick with along the way ~

  1. Keep hands busy – drawing, playing with play-doh, building with blocks, or other quiet thing will stretch an attention span beyond your wildest imagination. In fact, some studies show that busy hands make brains learn more easily! My oldest now likes to stay focused while she’s listening to lessons by taking notes, but up until this year, she was sketching or molding dough along with the others.
  2. Take it outside – literally, take all of it outside any chance you get. Little people are happier out of doors. Fact.
  3. Snacks are golden learning opportunities – while many homeschool families do their ‘morning time’ or cultural studies first thing, I find that a 10:00 gather round the table with a snack works best for us. We have a snack, read some poetry or listen to a composer/hymn or study a piece of artwork, do some literature or geography, read a Bible passage, and the whole time the little people are (relatively) happy because they have their little hands busy and bellies full.
  4. When you have a breastfeeding baby, find a favorite educational show. I know, I know, TV is a crutch, but some babies don’t eat well when there’s a lot of action around them. A 20-minute Wild Kratts or Wishbone gives just the right window for giving the baby a good feeding in the mid-morning, hopefully followed by a nap, and that  100% makes the rest of the morning go better.
  5. Share some responsibility – There are some things we just can’t do all together. During these times, we trade responsibility. One child is responsible for keeping the baby happy, while the other student is taught by the parent, and then we trade off. This works best if I set an expectation for how long and why I need one of the kid’s help, so that they can understand the important role they’re playing in our family and so that they don’t get frustrated with being asked to help when they feel like they should be having a break.

Family dynamics are unique and ever changing, but I’m pulling for you as you figure out what works best for your amazing family in your homeschooling journey. And if you have any epiphanies about what works for you, please share!